Why worry?

I fall into the trap a lot. Especially recently and I don't know if others fall into it as well or if I've helped drag them into it. Possibly a mix. As the day of my departure for camp comes closer the uncertainty of my future feels bigger and bigger. I have to constantly remind myself that God knows my future and He has nothing but good planned for me, because I don't like the uncertainty. And I don't like the thought of some of the possible outcomes. So I also need to keep remembering that what God gives He also has a right to take away. As painful as that will be if He does. So I am in a limbo of enjoying and making the most of the time I have left here and not wanting to enjoy it too much so as not to miss it too much. And then this portion of verse comes to mind. "Make the BEST use of the time because the days are evil." So not doing things because I'll wish to be back here when I think back is not a good enough reason. I do need to think carefully about how I use my time - which right now is the three weeks I have left in Edinburgh before the summer. And I need to be ok with the fact that everything could change when I get back. Sigh.

Beautiful Moments

The fullness of Your grace is here with me The richness of Your beauty’s all I see The brightness of Your glory has arrived In Your presence God, I’m completely satisfied For You I sing I dance Rejoice in this divine romance Lift my heart and my hands To show my love, to show my love A deep deep flood, an Ocean flows from You Of deep deep love, yeah it’s filling up the room Your innocent blood, has washed my guilty life In Your presence God I’m completely satisfied

-Phil Wickham "Divine Romance" In the past wee while, there have been some beautiful moments. Some beauty was fully evident in every aspect, other times it was hidden in tough circumstances. I just wanted to share a few of these beautiful moments. A couple of weeks ago we had an evangelistic service at the Assembly Halls which was good. The beauty though was in seeing someone go up to the speaker and ask lots of questions, and seeing other people who had agreed to come along. The potential was awesome! We're still praying for many of them and keep on hoping. The word of God does not come back empty. Forgiveness. Having hurt and confused someone one day and being forgiven even before an apology is offered the next, is nothing less than beautiful. Moments and conversations that are too special and perfect to even begin describing have happened a lot lately and help me rejoice all the more in my Beautiful Creator. Someone coming to accept the Lord as her Savior is the most beautiful thing! And next week 3 people will be baptized after the morning service at Carrubbers. That will be most beautiful indeed! One day last week, we had a new child attend the after school club. She is 4, and goes to nursery. The reason she was at the club that day was because it was her mum's funeral. Her mum was a drug addict, who had repeatedly tried to get clean after her daughter's birth, but failed each time. The child's dad is also a drug addict, he's not clean and drugs have ruined him completely. He can barely sign his name. The child's granny has full custody of her. I don't know how much she is aware of. But in spite of all this, she is the most beautiful, lovely, happy child I have ever met. She oozes joy and her eyes sparkle when she speaks. Two people wanting what is best for the other person. I love to see that happening in my life. The laying down of one's rights or even just desires and putting the other's first. There is inexplicable beauty in doing things right, doing things God's way. Last weekend the sun shone like it hasn't in a long long time. Derek and I climbed the Scott Monument and had the best view of the city. The lighting was perfect, the trees were blooming and the grass was green. Edinburgh is beautiful at the grayest of times, but when the sun shines, it is a sight not to be missed. Later that evening, we watched a sunset from Louise's window. Probably one of the best views in town. A long window facing West has got to be good! Beautiful moments. There are some things we cannot understand. There are some things we cannot see. "We must remind ourselves during these painful moments that just because we can't feel God's presence does not mean He has abandoned us. Sometimes God does His greatest work when we are lost in the desert." But in these times, just remember. Jesus says:

"I will be with you. I will have my hand on your hand as you go through things."