Questions.

‘My grace is sufficient for you.’ [...] Out of his fullness, I shall receive, and grace for grace. [...] My needs are many, but my supplies are infinite. Though millions of weak, tempted, persecuted, dying believers, have been invigorated in every age by this living water, yet its streams are undiminished; it still remains as it ever was — Grace Sufficient! Sufficient to relieve the needy, to strengthen the weak, to pardon the guilty, to sanctify the unholy, to support the disconsolate, to comfort and save all, however vile and worthless; who sincerely, fervently, and perseveringly seek for it, through faith in Christ.
- Thomas Reade

If I'm living dependent on Him, can I not then do all He's given me to do? If Christ's love for me then overflows in me and onto other people as and when I interact with them, as it should, is the love poured out not limitless? Does the fact that I'm human mean I need to consider myself, and stop or slow down when I feel utterly spent, weak and overwhelmed? Is worrying about Index making it worse? (Probably.) Am I trying to be God?

It seems, no matter how much I pray for strength for the day, for God's love and grace to be shown in my life that I fail. I feel completely drained by the least human interaction with someone who is a little more demanding than the norm and retreat. Spending 7 hours of my day with 6 needy, demanding, whiny children seems to be taking its toll slowly but surely. I could do that, recharge my batteries in the evening ready for the next day, except I don't want that to be my life. So I meet up with people, I plan and organise things, and I live. But more and more, I'm failing at being like Christ to both these things. Am I doing too much? Am I putting myself under too much pressure, too many demands and spreading my emotions and energy too thin? 

I wish I knew the right, godly, wise thing to do here.